Online Dating

Just the other day, I was explaining to a client that Craigslist can be something of a mixed bag. For example, while you may get 300+ replies just for being female and having a pulse, frequently only 25 or so are worth really considering, and then only 10 or so worth actually writing back to. Sad, but that’s just the way it is. People tend to respond in weird and inappropriate ways, often hitting up very much the wrong category as well.

I started to warn her about some “Craigslist Crazies” who will occasionally go so far as to send little more than a picture of their genitals… and right then, in real time, she got a ridiculously rude, short and poorly-written response to her ad essentially telling her that there was no way a woman with a picture as cute as hers could a) be her age, and b) be on Craigslist. Talk about a backhanded compliment! He essentially told her to f*ck off and get on Match.com… interesting stragety.

This was *immediately* followed up by a nice-seeming guy who wrote several paragraphs about himself, asked interesting questions… and then got right to the point: he was looking for a third in an M-F-F threesome. Yeah, in response to her ad seeking, you know, a soul mate. Save a LITTLE something for the second date, buddy.

Ah, Craigslist. At least you never fail to entertain!

Social networking sites have morphed a lot over the past couple of years.  Back when Friendster was all there was, I know a LOT of people who found love (and lust) on that site, as well as friends, business networking contacts, etc. etc.  But now that the social networking stratosphere is significantly fuller, things get a bit more complicated.

The era of Myspace was a favorite for lots of people I know.  It was so easy — if you had a unique Myspace URL, it was a great way to send a potential online date a simple link that included some photos and snippets about you, but didn’t disclose your most personal information (like your last name, place of work, etc.).  While Myspace allowed for lots of disclosue, the culture wasn’t wild about putting too many details in, so it was a pretty safe and secure way to show someone a snapshot of your personality without disclosing too much sensitive stuff.

And it had another great application — as an online dating network. I know TONS of singles who used to use Myspace as a way to search for and contact other compatible singles.  Now that Myspace’s heyday is over, those singles are lamenting all the changes to the online social scene — private profiles mean you can’t search for cool matches as easily, and Facebook’s dominance means it’s not a good dating platform.

Did you catch that, readers?  Facebook is NOT a good dating platform!  First and last names, places of work, detailed geographical and employment info, and no unique URLs means bad news for online dating.  Facebook is a great tool in many ways, but this is just not an area where it shines.

So for now, stick to hand-picking which details your potential bachelor(ette)s receive, and happy (and safe) dating!

Whee, I’ve finally managed to make the time to get the blog working right for this site! It’s not much yet, but at some point I will likely start porting content over from my Seattle P-I Reader Blog, so keep an eye out for that in the coming weeks.

The main thing I’m excited to bring over is a couple of book reviews I did. The market for GOOD online dating books is pretty slim, and of course many of you know I’m already working on my own. But there are one or two really fun reads already out there that can help people get more comfortable with the idea.

And boy, do some folks need easing in! Of course, online dating is rapidly gaining caché as an acceptable way of meeting your match, so I run into this problem a lot less frequently than I used to. But MAN, have I crossed paths with a lot of people lately who have wildly inaccurate negative ideas about e-dating. I can’t wait to get my official word out there in print and help make a dent in that undeserved stereotype!